Sep 30 2014

Are the Conservatives holding their annual conference?

015012f206ae2d19a332cf7e47bde72ad1881c1608For the past nine years, the start of the Conservative party conference has been overshadowed by the feats and exploits of members of Barnes’ premium running club. This year, the media maelstrom surrounding Mr Newmark’s reckless genital tweets and Mr Reckless’s carefully-timed UKIP defection quickly died down as the focus shifted to Bishops Park, Osterley Park, Windsor, Ealing and Kent.

Saturday morning saw David Cornock continuing a well-established tradition of Barnes Runners winning the Osterley Park parkrun, finishing a full 15 seconds ahead of his nearest rival and posting a PB on that particular course in the process.

In Fulham, Paul Cheetham and Dylan Grimes finished third and sixth, respectively, in the beautifully-timed Bishops Park parkrun, both posting PBs in the process.

Barely 24 hours later, the same athletes finished 12th and 37th in the Ealing half marathon, again posting PBs in the process.
Competing in the same race were Celeste Biever, Jenni Cunniffe and Helen Kelsey, all of whom – surprisingly – ran their fastest ever half marathons.
Meanwhile, a few miles upstream, up-and-coming senior Denise Bates was coming second in her age category in the Windsor Half Marathon, beating 261 frail old ladies to a place on the podium.
Further afield in Ireland, Lorraine Kelsey was busy taking photographs of the Giants Causeway Marathon, while faithfully tweeting and texting about how much she was enjoying it.
And finally, somewhere in the Kent countryside, recent joinee Bart Van Der Vliet was doing something unholy with a wetsuit and a bicycle to finish 61st in the Hever Castle Half Ironman.

Please do not forget this Saturday’s mob match in Bishops Park – a reminder that successful athletics meets need not necessarily involve winning. Our objective for the morning will be to convincingly invalidate the scoring system and explain to members of Ealing Eagles and West 4 Harriers why – despite all evidence to the contrary – we are, in fact, better athletes.


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